Stupid b*tches

This weekend the stupid b*tch who lives above me was being so noisy, and so was her dog (another stupid bitch, HA). Then on Saturday morning she went out and the dog was home alone, and it was running back and forth and barking and howling and I really wanted to get a gun and shoot right through the ceiling. Instead, I banged on the ceiling with my umbrella. The umbrella broke, and then a sharp piece of it went through my hand. And then like 10 gallons of blood came out of my hand and onto the floor. Ow.

Then, I was so mad I decided to call the police to see if I could file some sort of noise complaint. So I called 911, but then I hung up right away cuz I felt bad about tying up the 911 line with an obvious non-emergency.

As I was looking through the phone book for the non-emergency police number (with blood still pouring out of my hand) 911 called me BACK, but when I tried to answer the phone it was broken and wouldn’t pick up. So 911 left me a message saying they were sending emergency personel out to my apartment. And I’m thinking great, when they get here and find me covered in my own blood, clutching a broken umbrella, and hysterical over a barking dog they are going to lock me up.

But I called 911 back and straightened it all out.

I hate stupid b*tches.